Oh...hello there

As you can tell, I am pretty good about blogging only once a month. Problem is, I did not blog at all in May. My bad guys, my bad. I left May 4th from Waterloo, Iowa to head to Texas. I just got back from the Lone Star State on Memorial Day. You would think that throughout the three and a half weeks I was in the South I would have at least something to talk about.

Ok, this is what I have to say about my time in Texas.

It was hot. There was a lot of alcohol. Scorpions are mischievous and scary little creatures.

All in all I had a blast. It almost felt like I had moved back home. It was nice seeing a bunch of people I had not seen in a while, and spending time with my family is always a hoot. Numerous individuals had commented on my blog and quoted on how much they enjoyed reading it. I was ordered by a few to "keep it up! Don't stop!" I thanked them and appreciated their generous comments, and assured them that I do not plan on stopping. Let's face it, this is practically my job now...which is part time...and unpaid....

There is only one problem with all of this. You see, I am unemployed. I stay at home and I don't have any kids (and for the next 4 months I won't have a dog either).

I have NOTHING to talk about.

My sister Elaine told me I needed to write about stuff that people can relate to. Okay, that's an excellent idea. Thanks sis. So I started thinking...what is it that I do that I can talk about that other people can also relate to?

....

Here are my options:

1.) How to suck at being a housewife
2.) How to burn Hamburger Helper
3.) The benefits of vacuuming and what it can and cannot do to help your figure.
4.) How to sleep until 9:30am every morning yet tell your fiance that you "got up early and got stuff done!"
5.) How to let your yard become overridden with weeds and thus become the laughing stock of the neighborhood.
6.) How to Swiffer Sweep linoleum flooring.
7.) How to identify which daytime tv programs are complete crap and which are award winning. (Spike TV's Jail is awesome!)
8.) How to constantly buy your significant other the wrong type of underwear three times in a row.
9.) How to make a list of shit your significant other needs to do even though he works all day 5 days a week and you do not.
10.) How to spend money without earning any back.

Or I could just talk about being unemployed.


Ok...let's go with that.



Next post.



Which won't be in a month.



I promise.



Swear.



Do you believe me?



Please?



You can trust me!



Alright, I'm going to watch "Jail." (Don't judge! It's a marathon and I already folded the laundry.)

- Shirley