Children Not Required

It's July! And it's hot! Well, relatively hot because up here it's only 84 degrees....

And I love it. So yes, I am going to rub this in your face. I'm sure it will get a bit warmer from here on out. Like, maybe in August it will get to 90 for a few weeks. But then September will roll around and we'll drop down into the 80s and 70s again.

In your face.

Remind me about this post, though, when December rolls around will you? I am sure by then I'll be hating life and making a promise to God that I will donate $5 million dollars to the homeless shelter if I never have to go outside and brave the arctic chill ever again. While you guys down South will still be wearing bikinis and getting a tan.

Let's call it a fair trade, all right?

I am coming to you today to talk about absolutely nothing. Let's face it, I am unemployed and boring. Today I scrubbed three toilets. THREE. How exciting. Thank goodness I don't have to do this crap everyday.

Oh wait, yes I do.

Laundry, dishes, cooking, dusting, organizing, picking up Jordan's clothes, vacuuming, wedding planning, mopping, and grocery shopping. But my most favorite thing to do? Walking across the street to our mailbox to check the mail. When shit hits the fan and I am just having a terrible day, checking the mail always saves me.

Except those days when we don't get crap in the mailbox but a measly Khol's promotional slip. On those days I slip into a mild form of depression.

I'm kidding.

But I really do like checking the mail.

Since we are the new in the neighborhood and meeting all the neighbors, everyone loves to ask me if I have a job. When I tell them no, I seem to get a lot of responses like this: "oh my! You're going to get bored! You better start having babies!" It's like these people believe my life will be a waste of time unless I pop out 12 babies.

We disagree.

Anyway, Jordan used to ask me the same question, until he worked from home one day and saw me in action. He was surprised to learn that I don't watch t.v. and that I actually have a lot of stuff to do. What he didn't realize was this:

Jordan hates wearing his work clothes any longer than he has to, and I don't blame him. As soon as he steps foot in the doorway he trades his slacks and collared Polo's for his basketball shorts and cotton undershirt. And where do the work clothes go? On the couch, on the floor, on the random ass t.v. sitting in the middle of our bedroom floor serving no purpose at all (except as a place for Jordan to strewn his crap), in the kitchen, in the living room, and everywhere. Part of my daily tasks is to pick these random articles of clothing from multiple locations throughout the house.

Men. I will never understand them.

Being unemployed is not all that bad. I get to sleep til 9am everyday and travel to anywhere I want at anytime. I don't have to worry about taking time off of work and pissing off co-workers. If I want to go to Texas, I pack up the car and go. Of course, I have plenty of daily obligations as well. For instance, making sure the dog is fed and healthy, paying bills, watching our expenses and taking care of Jordan. but I also have a lot of freedoms too. I have the ability to do whatever I want in life - whether that's getting a full time job at a company, going back to school, writing a book, or raising 12 babies - I have the chance to live out my dream.

And if I end up having 12 babies...actually, let's not talk about that nightmare.

I have a feeling I'll get a job eventually. What type of job I have no idea, but hopefully something that is fulfilling and enjoyable. I have a few ideas of what I want, but getting them will be the challenge.

As for now I am content with wedding planning, traveling, and taking care of the house. I still suck at cooking, but I did manage to cook chicken tetrazzini the other day without it being a complete disaster. Hooray for me!

Jordan seems to like having a housewife as well. As long as he doesn't get lazy, it doesn't bother me to be domestic.

But dear god, I do hope something comes along soon because I am seriously not going to have 12 babies.

- Shirley