Excuse me? You're going to stick that needle where?

Tomorrow, I am going to have a FNA Biopsy. The actual procedure doesn't make me nervous, it's the fact that there is a REASON to get it done. I know I shouldn't have anything to worry about, because the past three doctors I have visited have all told me the same thing. "You're young", "It's rare", "I wouldn't worry it is most likely benign". I trust them, but a part of me doesn't. I have heard these things before. I have seen the impossible become possible, the rare develop into the not so rare, and the thought of "this can never happen to me" ripped out of make-believe into reality.

So yes, I am a little nervous. But I know everything is OK. But I am still scared. My mind has been going back and forth since my initial visit to the doctor. After tomorrow, I can't even imagine the roller coaster my emotions are going to be on until I get the results back.

Part of me wants to cry and a part of me wants to tell the part that wants to cry to stop overreacting and shut up. Finals are coming up and I should be way more worried about History and English at this point then some body abnormality. I know I will be OK, it's just the thought of the impossible that I am not comfortable with. Nothing is impossible.

Lately, things have settled down a whole bunch. School has ended and I only have one day of finals to prepare for and it is next week. I have seven days to study for two finals. Doesn't sound real stressful, and it isn't, but it's a lot of tedious work that I'd rather not do. A pool, Corona with Lime, or even a Shiner Bock, sounds so much more enticing than a library with British History text books and English journals.

I had a nice weekend with family and friends and my all-time favorite puppy Jake. I realize how my family feels about animals (with me being the exception) so I will not divulge into all sorts of details about how cute the 5 month old yellow lab was these past 4 days. I will, however, brag about how I successfully managed to teach him to lay down and fetch within a short span of time. Who doesn't love a feeling of accomplishment these days?

- Shirley