Tuesday, October 14, 2008

For tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun

Life is stressful. Very stressful in fact. The rollercoaster emotions of daily life and the constant ups and downs of your luck drain every ounce of energy out of your body. Exhaustion, fatigue, malaise, whatever you want to call it, will always be prevalent, which in turn causes more stress. Does it ever end? Does anyone ever have true happiness and a life without sudden upturns for the worse? I believe not. Damn, maybe I am a little pessimistic. But there’s the catch; in an overpowering pessimistic society, somehow, you have to find a way to be optimistic. In every pessimism there is optimism (have I confused the shit out of you yet?). I believe everything happens for a reason, and that sometimes, shit just happens. However, as long as you have faith and remain positive, an enlightened opportunity will arise. Recently, I have been down on my luck. Low on cash, mounting bills, education overload, and an incapacitating inability to find employment can give anyone a serious case of the blues. Nonetheless, I still find myself waking each morning with a smile (after, of course, debating with myself for 30 minutes on whether or not I should just skip class and go back to that wonderful feeling of sleep) and tackling the ever growing stresses of the day. Jordan has constantly asked me how I remain in this state of positive attitude. My answer is always the same. Life sucks, it’s supposed to suck, and it is most definitely going to be hard. But, the sooner you accept this inevitableness of life then the easier it is to deal with daily obstacles. Plus, everything, and even minor small things, become so much more enjoyable that eventually the good outweighs the bad. Each time I start to feel down I think of all the wonderful people and things I have in my life, and pretty soon, the problem doesn’t seem so bad anymore. Too many people worry about too many things. If everyone just appreciated everything that God blessed them with then the world would be such a more beautiful and peaceful place.

For instance, the reason I can keep such a positive attitude when times are hard is because I know I have the world’s greatest family ready to help me whenever it need be. Just being able to go home and laugh with my dad, spend time with my sisters, or hang out with my cousins can make a day of hell seem like paradise. The previous seven days, I had one of the most stressful school weeks this semester yet. Five tests in four days, all around my twenty-first birthday. I spent ten days living in our campus library studying for ten hours straight. I thought I was going to go mad. I was reciting rock types and mineral qualities in my sleep, shouting ancient Greek philosophy as I made dinner, and deciphering the tone, timbre, and form of each musical piece I heard on the radio, computer, etc. However, the end of the week came, and lo and behold who was there to save me from my week of hellacious studying and test taking but my family. My sisters and close friends all traveled from Houston to help me celebrate my birthday accordingly, and just their presence was the best birthday gift I could have received.

When life starts to become a challenge and you find it hard to be in a good mood, you have to look on the bright side. For every raincloud lies a rainbow on the other end. Some happy endings are not so easy to come by. Patience and faith are huge ingredients in pursuing happiness. I know my life is far from perfect. Hell, I am far from perfect. But I have faith in my lord and know that if I can battle through his tests here on earth I will be rewarded in the end. In the meantime, now that I am broke, unemployed, and overwhelmed with scholastic duties, I am going to do my best to remain positive. This week, and even this past month, hasn’t been so great but I won’t let that get me down. I have a great family that I get to see this weekend, and the next weekend, and possibly the next two weekends after that. If you had to ask me, the days ahead look good.

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